Knights? Yeah right!
by flyingpigscantofly
Summary: Laura is transported into the universe of King Arthur. Read the chapter to find out more!


She slammed the front door shut behind her, storming out to her car. She was unlocking the driver side door when her boyfriend, now _ex-_boyfriend, appeared at the front door with a sheet wrapped around his waist.

"Laura! Please wait! We can talk about this!" he pleaded. Laura turned to him, the rage boiling through her veins shining in her eyes.

"We have nothing to discuss. Have fun with your whore," she ground out before getting in her car and speeding away. She drove in a daze, trying not to think about walking in on her boyfriend of three years and her best friend having sex. She took all the shortcuts she knew of in the small college town to the highway. As she accelerated onto the on-ramp, the sky began to rumble and pour down rain. _Just fucking perfect._

Laura turned on the radio, and laughed bitterly when Lips of an Angel by Hinder started to play. Fumbling with the radio settings, she failed to notice a car swerve into her lane. She finally looked up when the headlights shone into her face, blinding her. Screaming, she tried to swerve, but it was too late. The car hit her own, forcing it off the highway to roll down an embankment, finally stopping when the car hit a tree.

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Groaning, Laura opened her eyes. Her head throbbed, and when she touched it she felt blood running down a gash in her eyebrow. She saw blood on the steering wheel and figured her head must of hit it. Unbuckling her seat belt, she felt along her torso, knowing it would be bruised all to hell. She opened the car door, and stood up. Her head started to spin, and she sat down in the snow. _Snow? I thought it was raining?_ The landscape around her was covered in snow, and she appeared to be in a forest. _I wasn't driving anywhere near a forest, though. What the hell is going on? _Waiting for the dizziness to pass, she slowly stood up and wandered into the clearing she could see through the trees. Dressed only in a t-shirt and jeans, Laura was soon shivering. She stumbled over tree roots and rocks hidden by the snow, but finally made to the clearing.

What Laura had originally thought was a clearing turned out to be a field. A large one, since no trees were visible on the other side. A rather large hill was on her left, and a smaller one on her right. She heard a drumming noise coming from her left. It sounded so familiar, too irregular to be an actual drum. Then she heard what sounded to be people running coming from her right. The odd drum noise was approaching fast, and then it clicked. _Horses! Galloping horses, like on Aunt May's ranch..."_

Men on horses wearing very strange armor crested the left hill and began to ride down it just as men and women in different, though still very strange armor, crested the other hill. _Is this some sort of medieval reenactment thing?_ She expected them to stop when they saw her, to take her to the nearest hospital, but neither side did. The people on foot reached her first.

"Hey! What the fuck is going on!" She yelled as one of the people stopped in front of her. The man was covered in blue paint, and some sort of leather armor. His hair hung to his shoulders, and he was carrying a not so friendly looking sword in his right hand. The man looked at her for a second before lunging at her.

"Ah!" Laura yelled as she felt the sword cut her across the stomach. It was a shallow cut, but it did nothing to improve her temper. "You fucker! Shouldn't you be using a prop sword!" The man did nothing but lunge at her again. Adrenaline pounding through her veins, she ducked and punched the man in the nose. He took a step back, holding his bleeding nose in his hand. Snarling he lunged once again. Laura sidestepped the blow and brought her knee up into his stomach, causing him to drop his sword and double over. Grabbing his sword, she brought the hilt down on his head, knocking him out. "Learn some new moves, asshole."

Laura moved away from the man and looked around her. The men on horseback seemed to have taken care of most of the blue people. She leaned heavily on the sword, the adrenaline wearing off and the bruises from her crash began to make themselves known. One of the men on the horses dismounted and walked towards her, giving her time to study him. He wore a red cape and walked with an air of authority. He was tall with brown hair and kind eyes. Laura distrusted him immediately. Looks could be very deceiving.

"My lady, are you alright?" he asked, voice showing concern. Laura's eyes narrowed.

"I am not a lady. You all have one hell of a screwed up reenactment going on here. As far as I knew, you weren't supposed to use real weapons and kill each other."

"Reenactment? My lady, this is a war."

"There is no war occurring in the Midwest! Did someone hit you in the head?"

"I think you are the one with the head injury, although it is a pretty head," spoke a curly-haired man who had walked to them. The rest of the horsemen began to approach.

"Knock off the flattery, pretty boy. If you guys are going to insist on being difficult, then direct me to the nearest hospital, or police station. I have an accident to report."

"What the bloody hell is she going on about? Dag, check her for serious blood loss or something," said an obnoxious looking man with no hair.

"Listen baldy, and taller meaner looking baldy, I'm not suffering from blood loss! Now tell me how to get to the hospital!" Laura exclaimed, seriously annoyed with these men. _First I walk in on my cheating boyfriend and supposed best friend, now these weird guys with horses are trying to pull some prank on me!_

"Lady, we will take you back to our fort. It is no less than two hours away from here," announced the man who had spoken to her first, who appeared to be their captain.

"Yeah, whatever. I just hope that's crazy speak for the nearest town," she muttered before glaring at the men.

The one with long blonde hair began to laugh, "Oooh, she's feistier than Lancelot is when he gets rejected by a woman."

"Shut it and go braid your hair," Laura said, glaring daggers at him. The other men began to laugh, while the captain said, "Gawain, she should ride with you since she is so fond of you."

"Wait, what-" she was cut off as the one called Gawain swung her onto what she presumed to be his horse. He sat behind her on the saddle.

"Stupid men and stupid horses with their stupid commanders," Laura muttered under her breath as they began riding back to the fort.

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Laura tried to sit as still as possible on the horse. But each step the horse took caused pain to shoot through her ribs; she suspected she might have fractured one. She stared at her hands which were in fists, trying to breathe through the pain and also let none of the psychopaths on horses know that she was injured.

She glanced up as Pretty Boy rode up next to her and Gawain. "My name in Lancelot, may I have the pleasure of knowing yours?" he asked, the word pleasure rolling off his tongue obscenely. Laura's eyes narrowed.

"I bet you think you're God's gift to women don't you? Well go bother someone else." She turned back to look at her hands.

The man behind her chuckled. "She has you figured out already Lancelot. It usually takes women at least a night with you to work that one out."

Lancelot's face turned red at his intentions being discovered so early in the game. "Well, _lady_, I believe in no one's god." With lack of a better retort, he rode ahead of them.

Gawain looked at the back of head of the woman sitting in front of him. "Are you a Roman then? You believe in God?" he questioned.

Laura sighed before answering, "I believe in no god. It is merely an expression." After that, all conversation attempts failed as the only thing she did was stare at her hands.

When they finally reached the fort, it was all Laura could do to not sigh in relief. Her side was in agony, and she was prepared to kill for some aspirin. The gates to the fort opened, and the horses walked through. Gawain dismounted the horse, and Laura followed suit. She stumbled when she landed on the ground, but Gawain's hands on her waist steadied her. "Thanks," she muttered before swatting his hands away. Stepping away from the horses in the courtyard, she surveyed the fort. It looked very much real. _"_This looks pretty convincing. One elaborate prank. You guys must work for some dumb television show. So," she said turning to them, "where are the cameras?" The obnoxious one muttered something about being addled in the brain. Laura was about to reply when the tall bald man referred to as Dag grasped her elbow and steered her towards a building.

She stumbled alongside him, and they ended up in a crude looking infirmary. "Seriously, dude, I need a hospital-" Dag pushed her towards one of the beds and said, "Sit."

She sat, and secretly glad to do so, since it took some of the pressure off her side. Dag attended to the gash on her eyebrow first, putting some salve on it and then a bandage. Laura glared at him all the while. Dag smiled at her once finished with her brow, then asked, "Where else are you hurt? Your ribs?"

Surprised Laura asked, "How did you know?"

Dag smiled, "Some are more observant than others. The best I can do is bandage it to prevent it from moving too much. And put this salve on it to cool the pain." Laura nodded and lifted her shirt to just below her breasts so he could bandage the rib. Once he was done, she muttered a thank-you. She then yawned. Dag smiled again and led her out of the building, through the deserted courtyard and into yet another building. Up a flight of stairs, down a hall of doorways, one of which he stopped in front of. "You may sleep here, the knights' rooms are around yours, so you need not be afraid of anything." With that, he strode back down the hallway.

"I'm not afraid! I can take care of myself!" Laura yelled at his back. When he did nothing to acknowledge her, she stepped into the room. Exhaustion hit her like a brick wall, and she collapsed into the bed, only taking the time to kick off her tennis shoes.


End file.
